Monday, April 16, 2007

You can call me selfiiiiiish...

Ok, so, what do you do when you decide you just might want a child after all? I've come to the conclusion that I need a baby. Not b/c I want one right nowww, but I also don't want to be 'old' when I have it, and I'm already semi-dreading the age of 25. I wake up from daydreams/actual dreams w/ that number haunting me.. Altho that's more about unresolved youth issues gone by than my actual age.

But the kid thing, I'd like to have something of me to be around when I'm not. Maybe I should just write my memoirs. Then I'm guaranteed to love it, haha. So fucked up. Maaaybe I should wait, lol.

Honestly tho, I can see myself raising a kid to be like me. Maybe not exactly, b/c I'm a lil too much to pass on to a child, but as far as music and things like that go, I want another me. Fuck the father's wants and needs. I need a smart child that I won't grow to loathe, and the only way I can make sure of that is to raise it myself, right? Unless the father is just like me, but I haven't had any luck on finding someone even close. Fuckin' A.

K, the moment is passing. I think I'll just do the memoir thing. Hm..

Or will I???

See ya in nine months, bwahaha!

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