Soooooo, THIS is where my life is now.... [wtf!]

After spending a lovely week away from home, I return and I'm there for all of like, 20 mins before all hell breaks loose.

I'm telling my Ma about how financially irresponsible she is, and apparently after all we've been thru, THAT was the breaking point.

She called the cops and had them dragging my shit out of the house, cut my phone off (which app was happening tomorrow ANYWAY BITCH SO FUCK YOU), talks to me like I'm a complete stranger...............

TELLS ME SHE HAS BREAST CANCER.................

DID ANYONE ELSE HAVE A PROBLEM W/ THAT ONE?? OR IS IT JUST ME??

AAAAAAAAAAAND NOT ONLY THAT, BUT SHE TOLD MY SISTER MMMMMMOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHSSSSSSSSSS AGO..

MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER... MONTHS AGO.... WHICH IS APPARENTLY WHY SHE FOUND MY FAHJ... REALLY, IS THIS A TRADE OFF?? I CAN'T.

I CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN'T.

SO AFTER THAAAAAAAT, WE SPEND OUR LOVELY TIME IN THE RAIN FOR LIKE AN HOUR, AND THEN MY BRO'S CAR.. THAT BITCH................. Didn't want me using my bro's phone. Really, cuuuuuuuz you cut mine off.. Aaaaaaand you're gonna complain about that, buuuuuuut every dime I earned this year went to you.... Soooooooooo........???

I wanted to move to MS after court, which was TODAY btw.. I got 30 days suspended provided I don't get into trouble, so she calls the COPS on me!?!? SHUUUUUUUUUUT THE FUCK UP...

DJGHKLJADSHFIASLHFJASHFASGHKLFGSABFSKGFLSHAFJASKLGFJHKGASFKLASHGVFKJASHGFKLASJHGFASLHFGEUOGLFKIJHASGFKGDSF

THIS IS HORRIBLE!! LMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFAO OMFG THIS IS HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRIBLE... HERE, LET ME POST A LITTLE SNIPPET FROM THE BOOK, SOMETHING I WROTE AFTER MEETING MY FATHER...;

"Meeting him was a sign of the apocalypse. I'm sure of it. It's all about to hit the fan now... I know my life, I know my fated patterns.. Watch where you stand, America, b/c I'm the next best thing... Iiiiiiiiif you're a lightening bolt. Something's gotta go wrong cuz I'm feelin' way too damn good. Never a truer statement. Well, other than all the other ones I say that about. Either way, the shit rings true as a bitch in my ears. We started talking about all this stuff, like how w/ all my travels and refusal to stay put I've just been looking for myself etc. I disagree tho, that's more of where my relationship w/ my mother comes in. My whole life, she's been the one person I wholly and completely belonged to, so of course I clung to her. CLING to her. When the entire world lets me down, and it does, she is the person I can turn to, whether she knows that's what I'm doing or not. I suffer thru some of the worst heartbreaks you could imagine just to feel like I have something to hold onto. It may not be a blue blanket, but it's damn comforting. Just seeing her face makes me feel better. I can't imagine what I'll do when she's gone."

REEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLYYYYYYY?????? And Grace is my witness that I didn't just type that shit up.. She's right next to me, and saw me open Blogger and copy that piece.. I am the Oracle, apparently.. How did I fucking know something bad was going to happen?? Oh wait, b/c it always does..!!

ALWAYS!! OMFG!!!!!!!!!

BREAST CANCER???????? Remember the blog I wrote about the dream where she was dying?? This year. All the nightmares I've been having lately and telling people about that have to do w/ her BEING GONE.. WTF!!?! I don't want to believe it, not @ all.. I want her to somehow get ahold of me and tell me she's not sure, that it's only a possibility. WHICH is probably the case, but until I know...... And if she tells me she DOESN'T have it?? WHOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAMYFUCKING GOD... WHAT IF SHE ONLY SAID IT TO KEEP ME FROM KILLING HER!?!?! ANYTHING'S POSSIBLE @ THIS POINT, LMMMMMMFAO..

I'M DONE. I'm freezing, I'm hungry, I'm HOMELESS....

I'm gone.



PS, that's def her ringer and has been all year.