Seriously, what in the hell...

Did I do to recieve horrible service EVERYWHERE!?!

I was just thinking about last Sat when I got the grossest eggs possible @ Denny's (Rosemont).. Not only that, but what did I do to deserve the same exact response from Lauren every single time. As a friend, I am BEGGING YOU to never chime in ever again when I am voicing a food-related complaint. As I have said MANY, MANY times to ALL of my friends who've worked in that industry - I DON'T GIVE A SINGLE SOLITARY FUCK about where YOU worked, and how they did it, etc.. I DGAF whooooo's fault it is, b/c I know for a fact that it's not MINE. It seriously irritates me more than the food fuck-up when people constantly have something to say, as if A, they cooked my meal, or B, I GIVE A FUCK. I am thisclose to punching the next person - WHOEVER IT MAY BE - in the mouth for even considering to argue against me when it ISN'T YOUR PLACE TO SPEAK B/C I AM NOT TALKING TO YOU/ABOUT YOU.

DISHG;ISHJGKDKSLJG;SDKH JUST STFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ALREADY, GOD.. People seriously need to learn when to STFU.. Not just around me, which would be AWESOME btw, but in general. If you have nothing valid to say, please.... Talk to someone else stupid, my brain is on dumb-overload.

But back to the food.. Morgan has become my official order person b/c she can say it w/o getting irritated, lol.. We usually both explain how I want the food, b/c I just haaaaave to stress the anger that will be soon to follow if it's wrong.. We tell this bitch about the eggs.. LIGHTLY SCRAMBLED.. FLUFFY.. ZERO COARSENESS, 0, ZILCH.. I DO NOT like coarse eggs.. They should be yellow all around, not partially brown.. Even if it's just a leeeeeeeeettle bit, I can handle that b/c I always eat my center eggs and leave the COARSE OUTSIDES alone.. We explain all of that, tell her that I will not eat it if it comes out wrong.. And that I want crispy but not burnt bacon.. She runs the order back, I concur, that's that...

PLEASE... FOR THE LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE OF GOD, HELP ME UNDERSTAND HOW MY SHIT CAME OUT 10000000000000% WRONG... And while you're explaining, grab your shotgun..

My eggs are brown ALL OVER, to the point where I can hold them up w/o them falling apart.. SOOOOOO HARD and trife, omfg.. I immediately get pissed off, but I told the waitress that I'm not mad @ HER, that the cook is the fuck-up.. All that good shit.. This is where _____ chimes in b/c god FORBID she has nothing to say about something 100% not involving her, lol.. I'm trying to talk to the waitress while telling the Child Wonder to stfu b/c I'm not talking to her/not HER food sooooooo... OEFLGHJH;LDSGL;DFHKLSJDG I AM NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU N O T T A L K I N G T O Y O U. SHUUUUUUUUUUUUT THEEEEEEEEE FUUUUUUUUUUUCK UUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't know how many times/ways I can stress that, but there's my best shot of the moment. Grr.

ANYWAY, I'm getting more and more pissed off the more Lauren is talking to me b/c I seriously DO NOT and REFUSE to grasp the concept that a person can ASK YOU SPECIFICALLY WHAT YOU WANT and deliver anything BUT. Why are you writing it down??? Are you actually going to get it right!?!? Why is it that in food service, people are allowed to do the least amount of their job!? You took a job as a COOK, a cook who has NO CHOICE but alter my meal to my liking... People act like I asked him to make me fucking filet mignon (AND EVEN IF I DID.......)... IT'S CHEESE EGGS... GET IT RIGHT....!!!!!!!

And THEN the same chirping little bird asks me why I bother eating out if I'm going to complain.................................

WWWWWHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY SHOULD I BE FORCED TO EAT @ HOME/WHEREVER JUST B/C SOMEONE DOESN'T WANT TO DO THEIR JOB!??!?!?! If this was TACO BELL not giving us steak & nacho cheese ONLY Chalupas, you'd have a BF... IT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING, JACKASS, FOOD SERVICE IS FOOD SERVICE.. IF THIS IS WHAT I ASKED FOR, FUCKING GIVE IT TO ME, THANKS PREEEEEEEESH. NO excuses, just fucking DO IT...

Am I picky!?? YES, BUT I DGAF... I want what I want, and that's it.. WHYYYYY would I order and BE EXPECTED TO PAY AMERICAN CURRENCY for food I don't want!?!? I seriously don't get it, to the point where I just want to slap all parties involved... ____ called me earlier on lunch when she was pulling up to Taco Bell, and def said that she would flip the fuck out if her food is wrong...

HELLO, MS CONTRADICTION 2007, THAT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING I AM IRRITATED ABOUT, SO WHY DO YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUU GET TO COMPLAIN, BUT I'M SUPPOSED TO EAT IT???

OH NO WAIT, LEMME SEE.. "IS IT THAT BIG OF A DEAL???" "IF YOU KNOW IT COULD COME OUT WRONG, WHY WOULD YOU ORDER IT???"

ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU SAY TO ME!?!?!? EAT IT AND STFU THEN, LMFAO...

I love her, seriously, but that shit is maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad annoying.

Can't you tell?? It's not even just her, STEVO does it, along w/ pretty much everyone else, but only the two of them feel the need to say the same thing every fucking time.. Morgan feels me knockin, so I'ma let her in.. She will have a response to this, I bet.. She watches as the anger bubbles w/ every passing word/excuse...

OMFG, I am so irritated right now, lmmfao...

BASICALLY, THIS IS WHAT I WANT......

1. FOR NO ONE TO EVER EVER EVERRRRRRR SAY ANYTHING TO ME/THE SERVER/ANYONE ELSE WE'RE W/ ABOUT HOW AND WHAT I'M ASKING FOR.

2. FOR NO ONE TO EVER EVER EVERRRRRRR SAY ANYTHING TO ME/THE SERVER/ANYONE ELSE WE'RE W/ ABOUT MY COMPLAINTS IF AND WHEN MY FOOD IS FUCKED UP.

3. FOR YOU ALL TO REALIZE THAT LIKE I SAID, I DON'T WANT TO FUCKING HEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE/WHERE YOU USED TO COOK/ETC, B/C IT HAS NOOOOOOOOOOOTHING TO DO W/ THE POINT I AM MAKING, WHIIIIIIIIIICH BRINGS ME TO NUMBER 4, A B/T TWO FRIENDS I RECENTLY WITNESSED...

4. FOR YOU ALL TO REALIZE THAT NOOOOOTHIIIIIIIING IN LIFE IS MORE ANNOYING THAN WHEN IIIIIIIII AM ARGUING A POINT, AND SOMEONE ELSE ARGUES BACK W/ A POINT THAT ISN'T THE FUCKING POINT.

You sound stupid as FUCK for the entire convo, for one, and secondly, IF THAT'S NOT WHAT IIIIIIII AM SAYING, THEN STFU. Nothing else matters until my point is heard and understood, esssssp not in MY own eyes. I could gaf less what you're trying to convey until you get the ORIGINAL POINT, and if you don't, SAY IT, don't stand there like an idiot repeatedly yelling about the color blue when I'm WATCHING The Color Purple...

It's not TOMATO/TO-MA-TO, IT'S STFU B/C I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG, END OF STORY/SENTENCE/LIFE/PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERIOD.



Still one of the best clips EVER.

I am the black Rosie O'Donnell.

SHUT UP, TJ, don't say a word!



PS, that little clip is for you, ____. Just to show that I love you oh-so-much, and it's really not JUST you.. Just sometimes, lol. ♥