Half the bitch I used to be...

[From THREE years ago. Note the part about it all coming full surface. Told ya. I can't hold that shit back anymore. My brain is on a whole new level.]

Talking to Bre on the phone.. It's so funny, talking about the "old days".. Shit was so much different.. But the one thing I can say is, other than new evolving music, I'm still into a lot of the same shit, some even more now.. Like, it's more apparent now. Everytime I update my interests, it's to take one step closer to that person I know I am. Not to get too deep or anything, but ppl hold back a lot of shit and I'm trying not to do that. I'm into all kinds of shit, and anyone who's known me for a while can tell. I used to live for some damn controversy, and now it lives for me. I'm not setting out to shock bitches, it just happens that way. You wanna know about controversy? http://www.controversysells.com mowfuckas..

Vive Anatole!

And yes, I do still watch that shit. WTF airs a show @ 5 am!? Ugh. I heart you, Anatole..

Gerber. I feel like ppl are making their lives more difficult than they really are nowadays. You want some drama? I'll tell you many a tale, true tales, of some fucked up shit that hopefully will never happen to any of you.. Shit you'll never know about the mowfucka typing this.

So don't ever think you can read me.. I'll bust out w/ some shit to blow your mind.. It's only a matter of time before it all comes to full surface.. All these years of holding back are eating me alive.. Fuck that shit tho.. It started to come out back when I was like, 18 or so, but of course I kept fighting off everything. Blah. Up w/ being open. Maybe not all out there on display like a KMart clearance rack, but you know.. A Martha Stewart sale will do.

Moving on, all of my friends are hot in the ass right now. Some are even regretting it. Others are thinking about it entirely too much. And you, my formerly red-vested friend. Don't do it. Cuz if shit doesn't pan out the way you want it to (and it usually doesn't), it'll just be one more thing to dwell on in your life that you don't need.

Trust me. Work on the issue you have @ hand. That other shit will come and go as often as you like, once it first comes around.

I'm ending this w/ one of the greatest songs I've ever heard. It will be my first cover song.

"She"

She
She screams in silence
A sullen riot penetrating through her mind
Waiting for a sign
To smash the silence with the brick of self-control

Are you locked up in a world
That's been planned out for you
Are you feeling like a social tool without a use
Scream at me until my ears bleed
I'm taking heed just for you

She
She's figured out
All her doubts were someone else's point of view
Waking up this time
To smash the silence with the brick of self-control

Are you locked up in a world
That's been planned out for you
Are you feeling like a social tool without a use
Scream at me until my ears bleed
I'm taking heed just for you

Ehhhhhhaaoo

Are you locked up in a world
That's been planned out for you
Are you feeling like a social tool without a use
Scream at me until my ears bleed
I'm taking heed just for you
--

So fucking perfect. Ty, Billie Joe.