"It ain't no secret I'm an alcoholic..."

"The way I see it is the way I call it!"

GOD, I got drunk as a biiiiiitch, and early as fuck. I broke a chair, too! But, I DID introduce Dani's house to Flip Cup, and that's all that matters... B/t the bourbon/tequila w/ Adam after the Strawberry Festival (Pungoooooo, TOO FUCKIN' HOT OUT), the shots of Jager w/ Dani, and then my own beers + the 7234325 rounds of FC.... Yeah, it was a good night... And then I was good and tired... I went from freezing and grabbing a blanket, to waking up @ 5 am all alone!

Now, @ 6:50am, I'm watching Wedding Crashers... Still my shit!

Anyway, to everyone I saw last night, helloooooooo again! It was such a fun night... Too bad I tuckered out early... As a sonuvabitch, lol...

"I love you!" *places duct tape over sock in mouth* Hahaha this movie is weak...

K well my throat officially feels the pain of playing drinking games in the smokey ass garage! I'm 'bout to lay the fuck down and hope to high hell that it feels better later... I gotta call my Richmond baby loves b/c I was def supposed to go back and see them again.. It must happen today! I hope it's not as hot out tho, yeesh.....



Notice the hand in the middle.... Yeah, I said it! lol

Apparently they're "Dunkin Donuts" in concrete these days....

Cuz gooooooooddaaaaaaaaaamn that powdered one I had last night def has some acient Chinese secrets hidden it in...

How the fuck can you give someone a FORTUNE DONUT!?!? I felt like a scroll shoulda came out w/ the first bite..... Jesus... I was soooo fucked up, talkin' mad shit about that damn donut.... I can't even remember all that was said, but Dani & Sunny can vouch for the solidity of the "donut"... I was like, "Well, if the tire pops, I'm usin' the donut!!!" LOL.... That shit prob would've held, too.... I threw it out as we were coming up @ the left-hand turns on Rosemont @ the guard rail and that shit was like CLANNNNGGGGGG!!!!!!!! "I'ma throw some D's on this bitch!!!" Hahaha...

Disgusting.... That's why I fucks w/ Krispy Kreme!




Maybe DD should use a lil bit of that, lol.... "Solid as a ROCK!" I def remember singing that, as well.... Not too much else I remember tho... It quickly became a long night sometime after 10, 11ish pm..... Had to alleviate the stress so I "lifted my spirits".....

Boy, I wish ya'll coulda heard the nonsense pouring out... Sunny and Dani were dyyyyyying laughing.....

OH MY GOD! THE RICHMOND BOYS! Most deeef have to state the fact that SOME of my babies are in town camping (Sea Shore!), and I def went to kick it last night..... I had a blast for the time that I was there.... I was gonna stay the night but I left due to some other shit going on.... It's ok b/c I have all this holiday weekend to see my boys.... TODD, you better really be coming on Sunday..... Travis (Todd's bro, not T-Rav) tried to shun me after I called him "Tah" (I stopped before I threw the D's on that bitch) but he lovess me a lil too much for that!

Mhm, mhm!

K my sinuses are bloooooooown the hell out so I gotta lay the fuck down.... I straaaaaaaight passed the fuck out last night... Caught a case of the 'itis! Maybe the munchies did me in... Fuckin' donuts, man......

Oddly enough, my weirdest vomit ever....

Took place directly after watching Brokeback Mountain for the umpteenth time... Like, literally, as the credits are rollin' and Willie is singin' away, I got up to hawk up some phlegm and ended up puking milk and snot...

Sooooooo trife........

Guess I coughed a lil too hard. I was just tryna break that shit up.. My chest is HURTIN' right now....

So I changed my Myspace name to....

'I Wish You Knew How To Quit Me'........



Bwahaha... I ♥

Such beautiful landscapes, oh lawd....

"You SIT DOWN, you old sonuvabitch!!!" LMFAOGet'em, Jake...Anyway, speaking of young, hot males...



Kevin Zegers has come a long way since Air Bud.... Woo......

"Cuz I can't wait to fall in loooooove... w/ you..."

Ah, yes. The sound of... Well, it's not silence, but it's not drama, either. Life has been pretty normal, - a few instances, ever since that bulletin about drama. The past two weekends have been incredibly fun, and relaxed all @ once... Lauren and I had a blast cat-sitting for her Ma, and every moment in that apt was sheer comfort... We chilled, we ate mac n cheese.. We burned some good music, which excited me the most.. And watched a lot of CSI...

I'm so glad I have the people in my life that I do. Beach Crew, OG friends, new friends, BLOCK FRIENDS, lol... It's just really nice to go ANYWHERE in VA and know like 1/2 the people there, and have them be just as chill as I am!

Yay for me, yay for life.. Yay for a DJB show @ Southend Thurs night, yay for Brandi going w/ me! Yay b/c we're going to the beach together later...It's been a really good month... Don't let me front like it's been sunshine & strawberries (omfg I have Rocky Road ice cream in the freezer.. mmm) b/c I've had some bumps, too. I felt kinda shitty last night about something someone said to me, but I don't think they know it hurt my feelings as much as it did, so I'm not worried about it. They wouldn't have known why, so.....

Yeah, w/e.. I'm about to go and attentively watch Kameron & Kaleb.. Them two niggas are WILD! Love'em tho... Destructive asses.. Just like growin' up w/ my lil sis.. Some damn termites, destroying errrythang!

Visual birth control. I KNOW my kids would come out swingin...

Fuuuuck that. At least for now!

Twoooooo up, twooooo down!







<333

"Was there FOOD in the trash can!?" <333 last night...

Bwahaha, CSI on dvd is on of the last things I remember.. Pickens and I were watching it here @ Lauren's mas.. Yeah, we're still cat-sitting!

I got faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadeeeeeeeeeeed as a bitch last night, can't even lie. Normally I'm like, nah, just a lil buzzed etc etc..

Sssssssssike nigga, I was fucked up. Danielle's house is a blur of me coming in and out on the couch... W/ Pickens on my lap, no less! That's b/c I was @ Brent's from like, 6ish to after midnight gettin' fucked up... Let's start w/ the fact that there was a keg of Killians, and move from there. Plus someone came thru w/ mad Mickeys and you know that's my shit.. Gotta do the lil cap puzzles haha... And you knowwwww what else was present @ the shindig... It was a great night, all in all.

MINUS A LIL FAMILY BEEF, but I can't even think about that shit right now...... *smh*

It only took BRANDI 4 years to get there, but it's all good.... OHHHHHH DEF forgot about the "minor altercation" that took place pretty much as soon as we left...

Bitches, have you LOST IT!?!? Tryna get my family knocked, mang???

"And it really makes me wonder if I ever gave a fuck about YOU!"

Moving riiiiiiight along, wtfffff.... Normally I chill and let the night happen. Fuck that tho. I went into the night w/ plans to be fucked up, and it happened. Ty, Brent, for yet another awesome party... Soooooooooooo much family, it was unreal... Steven, thanks for kidnapping me.. This nigga.. I'm walkin' to Brent's car to get a cd out (which, btw, was Kingspade - PTB) when I was stopped NOT EVEN 1/4 of the way to the car and propositioned for a lil change of greenery @ Stevens...

Nigga booooounce... It was good seein' his 'rents tho cuz I ain't seen Mom dukes in a grip... She was like, OMG.. IT'S BEEN YEEEEEEEEEARS haha... We came back after like an hour, and everyone was like, LISA WTF, WHERE DID YOU GO!?!? Bitch, you know the name! I have a tendency to just disappear and pop up like shit's all cool lol.. Brandi right along w/ me.. She just wasn't there @ the time...

Oh, back to Danielle's house for a sec... Whyyyyyy in the hell were ya'll hitting each other w/ chairs and shit!?!? My groggy head just did a mini-recap of the night and I remember that now..... And people were chasing Keith.... Huh??? Sure, w/e.. LOL

Dani, I love you.

Oh, man.. I was taking pics of EVERYTHING... Nicky's camera prob has like 5645 pics now... That shit's got mad capacity, all I know.. Brent and Lauren also took pics, I do believe.. I think I started w/ Lauren's camera.. There's also a video of Jessica and I trying to take a pic of us.. AS USUAL.. W/ me, Brandi, and Jessica, we ALWAYS think we're about to take a pic, and people finally are like, "NO, IT'S A VIDEO!"....

Way to tell a bitch, lol...

OH MY GOD.. Scuba and Nicole were there! I just remembered that... OHH, YEAH, CUZ SOME DUMB BITCH HIS SCUBA'S FUCKING CAR AND DIDN'T SAY SHIT...Let me find out who it was...... Grrrrr.....

We stole Grace from the normal world and now she's prob never going to speak to us again lmmfao.. J/k, it seemed like she had fun to me, but I was also kinda D-O-N-E sooooo yeah... It's been awesome hangin' out and gettin' to know you better, girl! More fun times to come as the seasons roll around!

Jesus.. I forgot all about yesterDAY. The Redskins Beach Blitz shit was goin' on, boooooooooo! Fuck the Redskins, and fuck VA for having to borrow a team... That's some ol' bullshit.. But anyway, I ran into maaaaaad friends before the partying even started.. Ya'll know how it is @ the oceanfront, lol.. The one person I WANTED to run into, RICO, was nowhere to be found.. Justin said he saw him earlier, drunk as hell. Nigga musta started early as hell..

Ahh... I wonder what's gonna happen today? I think we're headin' back to the beach... That means I'll get to see Brandi - THE NINJA! Haha, let's see if she smacks me in the mouth upon arrival...K I gotta get my shit together and get some goddamn grub.. I'm out like shout!



Ey Scotty... "This nigga got on some stirrups!" - Me clownin' on everybody @ the beach, per usual...

Free Dontae! Free... MY BROTHER!?!? Wait, what!?!?

GEEEEEEEEET THE FUUUUUUUCK OOOOOUUUUUT....

My little brother. My ONLY brother. Nigga ain't even 19 and a 1/2 yet... Incarcerated. AGAIN.

But this time, it's not some traffic violation. He and Dontae are in some shit now...

FUCKING IDIOTS. All I can say. DGAF if that's my brother or not, and D-Tae is considered family always so it goes for him too. I'm worried about them both, but WTF did they expect!?!?

I can't w/ this info..... ABSOLUTELY CAN-NOT... GTFO....

Really, Lu? Is that what you want to do w/ your life? Spend it in and out of jail? And D-Tae?

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUCK..........

I woke up this am thinking, "Well, right now he's "enjoying" a trife ass tray of eggs."...........

So, I went to D-Tae's page to cuss him the fuck out about Lu, only to find out that THAT NIGGA got knocked right along w/ him, apparently...

I can't even begin to wrap my head around it, or the amount of time they may or may not have to spend behind bars.

I wonder if they're cellmates? Wouldn't THAT be cute?

I DGAF, nothing is sexier than FREEDOM.



Lucious = the right...

FREE LU & D-TAE!

PS def love how they look like they're @ an even height, meanwhile my bro is 6"4...

Goooodddddd, still thinking about the trip!

I haven't had that much fun in a minute.. And I def almost got into two altercations.. One was me straight snappin' on 3 girls @ Jaxx b/c I heard them talkin' shit about my bitches, and if it wasn't so obv, I would've let it go. But there was also a punk ass dude involved so I had to get @ him, too... Ugh... So aggressive! LOL

The other, I just woulda jumped into.

ATTN: THE 5 L'S (opening "band" @ Ziggy's). Or pay no attention to them @ all. Much advised. How you 'gon just run the gator like it's cool? Bitch, you are OPENING FOR ME...

Wise guys these days...

Anyway, THAT altercation was too weak, cuz mad fans were poppin' off after the shit got heated...

Brandi knows my exact favorite moment. Lawd.

Aaaaanyway, shit was hella fun, and I CAN-NOT WAIT until August.. Even w/ all the cool shows coming up, it's like nothing's happening until August...

Somethin' about those Noize shows, hm?

Get your tickets ASAP, kiddoes... That shit's gonna be insaaaaaane...

On the roooaaaddd agaaaiiinnnn.....

Well, I was, but we're home now. Been home for 2 hours, but I was bullshittin' and resizing pics.. Oh, did she say pics? Yes she did! LOL


Didn't take too many b/c the battery is the kind you gotta charge via USB and we deeeeef didn't have it w/ us.. Oh well, still had THE most awesome time everrrrrrr... Def have to say THANK YOOUUU to everyone on the tour b/c there was maaad mutual love goin' on.. Gotta love family! BJ, you're a funny dude...


What was that shit, Brandi??? Can't even remember lol.. The No-Doz might be wearing off!

Yeah, so Jessie/se/ssy and I took mad No-Doz on the way home so that I would keep her awake, and Brandi could sleep b/c she has to work 10-10 (oceanfront, go see her!)... I am def wired/tired all @ the same time, but more wired than anything right now.

Oh, gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhddddddddd I wish I could just insert a lil brain chip so you know what we just went thru! Not in a negative way, just def not tryna relay the entire two days..

I say it like it's a long time, but a lot can happen in two days! Uh, we saw some familiar faces, and met plenty of new ones! Picasso, youz a fool! Love runnin' into that fucker.

PPPPPSSSSSS Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead is DEF on right now.. LOOOOOVE it.Anyway, yeah..

OMFG.. The Kingspade set was aaaaaawesome, esp in NC b/c there were def more songs.. I have the setlist from NC (ty Richterrrr), maybe I should take a pic of that, too.. K n/m, camera being gay.. This is the setlist (as written):

Spaded Jaded
This That Beat
Who Wants 2 B
We RidinCheck Yo Bitch (diiiied, thanks)
Drunk In Da (don't you just love hearing songs live when you can envision yourself in the video? :D)
Who Runs This?
Smokin Doja
Neighbor Trends
Thats The Shit
Beat Box
High Riders



The Deal
Lifestyles
Down 4 Crown
MC-Breed
Same Ol Bitches
Have Fun
DJ Breakdown
P-Town (Placentia, not Portsmouth)
Life
That's How It Go


-Extras- (which def weren't played)

We Back
Keep On Risin

------



Aaaaaand cut! At the Jaxx show, like 6 of those songs weren't played.. Thank god we went to two shows.. I'm a lil upset over the lack of "every dude got a dick in her moooouth!" buuuut w/e..

PPS, I feel like a dick for not mentioning any other sets yet, b/c you KNOW the Souljaz set had us super-hype. Can't get into that, either, b/c it'll just make this eeeeeeeven longer than it is. Just know that I died. Fully.

Also, Brandi and I had this awesomely random convo w/ B & Dirt @ the bar before we left.. Looking forward to B's new album like a sooooooonuvabiiiiiiiiitch.. Not droppin' til late summer tho..

And the Strange Noize tour??? Call it a WRAP. That shit's gonna be HUGE.. Ya'll don't even knowwwwwww....

K Brandi's alarm is going off and I mooost def need to get her up, so I'm out this bitch..

Until next time...



Just as a PPPS, only one pic I took was zoomed in. We were just that ^ close. The first of the two w/ just Bobby was the only one I zoomed in on. The long shot w/ the PTB banner was straight on.

Fuck w/e I was gonna title this...

OMFG, remember when I used to post like, 7 blogs a day @ maaaad random.. Holy shit.. People think I'm bad now. The music I'm listening to now (PS def just got mad thinking about a cd I wanted to make) def makes me think of that time frame.. I'm in one of those moods, but @ the same time, my back hurts like a mowfucka.

At least it doesn't make me want to be 16 years old again. I'm fine w/ the memories lol.

Am I really listening to Nirvana - Breed right now? Not to say that I just started when I was 16, def not the case. But that was when I started coming to realize that I listened to a loooooooot of random shit while I read, or was looking for inspiration to write.. W/ Sherrita, even!

Aw, where are you? Lu ran into her, but lost her number. Fuckface!

Also, it's not the only band I'm listening to. But damn, it made my complete KC obsession float to the surface. Kurt >> Daniel??? Iiiii dunno..

Yes and no, final answer.

Anyway, I'm tired and delusional, but that's how it usually went down..
Maybe I'll even go into Y! Movie chat and do quotes all night, for old times sake haha...

brad_renfro311 like a sonuvabitch...

"Caaaaan yooooou seeee liiiiike a chiiiiiiiiiild..."

Ok, and now this band takes me back to being 12... I was sooooo in love w/ this song.. Still am. I think I'm going to die listening to music. It's a certainty. It can't happen any other way. Music is too detrimental to my survival in this fucked up world!

Ahahaha!

K, well I think Jessica and I are about to watch Harold & Kumar. If not, she's a cunt and I can't stand her.

I edited this to throw in that Nirvana DEF takes me back to 12, b/c I can still clearly remember crying after my boy told me while I was getting off the school bus (Blair Middle) that Kurt killed himself. My world was roooooocked.

K, NOW I'm out.

"If this keeps teeeaaarin' me apaaart...

So, I went on a cd-making frenzy. I was in a super-nostalgic mood and just went nuts..

I also made Lauren & Lee cds and may as well titled them z104's Greatest Hits of May '07. I felt like I burned the radio onto a cd, haha.. But none of it was for me, so w/e..

Anyway, all of myyyyyyy shit was such a soothing reliever for me.. I've been in some weird ass moods (duh) lately, more so than usual. It's finally happening.. I'll be the old lady who talks to herself all throughout the house, seeing shit..

"It's gonna huuuuurt, and I loooove the paaaaaain.. A breeding ground for hate, but...."

Oh god. It's always this song that does it!

"Remember todaaaaaaay, I've got nooooo respeeeeeect for yoooouuuuu..."

I will not cave!

The music.. I am alllllll about it now.. I want to hear more ______. LOL..

------>DGLHSDGKLJGIOUIRGYUR311quojace (CEEEEEEEEEEEEEETE!!!) <------

Only Jen, Cate, and Amanda will get that.

I wish you knew how happy I am right now!

Altho the thing I mentioned in the other blog makes me a liiiiiiil :

:

"GEEEEEEET THE FUUUUUUCK OOOOOOOOUT.......

Part two.

"Got myself a gun!"...

PS, I'm trying my damndest to sign up for this forum (undisclosed) but it's soooo not happening...

You, my friend, are such a fag.

Why does this keep happening??? Every one of'em, bitin' the dust. Sadness!

PPS, I def drew BeevoNerd in chalk @ Danielle & Jeremy's...

Ok, so I just got punched in the chest...

By my own memories. Listening to Fiona Apple - Sullen Girl.. I used to play that cd (Tidal) like it would self-distruct upon leaving my cd player.. I feel like I'm 15/16, laying on the lr floor/my bedroom, tears rollin' down the side of my head..

God, I really do miss that age. I think it's b/c that was right before all the changes in my life.. Job Corps, the weight, everything, my family.... Everything that I thought was hard to deal w/ back then seems so much easier now in comparison! I'd much rather have the problems I had then...

Oh, well.. Such is life!

"But it's caaalm under the waaaaves.. In the bluuue of myyyy obliviooonnnn..."

Or maybe I'm just being a dick.

You decide. What do I know about my own mind/feelings?

"Iiiiii don't wanna talk to you anymoooorrrre..."

"I'm afraaaaaaid of what I might saaaaay.. Iiiiiii bite my tongue everytiiiime you come around.. Cuz blood in my mouth beats... Blood on the ground..."

I put Incubus - Blood on the Ground on my cd b/c I just absolutely love it.. So easy to relate to... I used to listen to Morning View 24 hrs a day, literally. In my sleep, errrythang..

But right now, I need it to aide me thru my friendships.. Why do certain "women" bicker and nitpick w/ each other, knowing that all it does is put me in the fuckin' middle? Even if you're "just kidding" or someone took something the wrong way. Like I said before, not many people actually GAF how their actions fall on me. I don't want to hear someone else talking shit about another friend, but if I'm w/ you, and you're acting petty towards her, obv as soon as ya'll hang up, I gotta hear all the "wtf is her problem/yeah whatever" type shit that I really DGAF about. I'm not sayin' I've never done it, God knows I have, but DAMN. Every other word turns into something combative. Get the fuck over yourselves, ladies.

No one is worth that much stress, esp since I SHOULDN'T HAVE ANY IN THE FIRST PLACE, - MY OWN. And they all keep apologizing and rationalizing them placing their drama on my plate, but all I hear is "I'm not really sorry, or obv I'd stop. But b/c I haven't, you'll just have to deal."

Btw, please don't mistake this as me telling "you" to stop telling me when you're pissed off or upset. Just stop telling me when you're pissed off for no fucking reason, or it's something I've told you a million times that I don't want to hear about. I don't talk to ANYONE about topics they don't want to hear about 24/7, and if I do, it's subconsciously. When I hear "I don't care about ___", or can see the irritation, I stop. You do it knowing full well that I can't stand it. Why? Indulge me, please. Why would I care? Because I love you? No, that's not a reason. I do love you all w/ all of my heart, but it's getting to a point where I'd rather not talk to you than hear what so-and-so said to you that you took WAY out of context.

This also refers to a convo that was had this morning b/t two females, over who's had the worst week. Are you kidding me? I told her to ask you how your week was that bad, jacky, b/c I really wanted to know. She took it upon herself to leave out the fact that I asked it, which elevated the convo into potential drama. Why she did that, I do not know.

Maybe this is a feeling that comes w/ age? My 25th birthday is most certainly creeping up on me. Is this a quarter-of-a-life crisis, or just me growing up? Partially doubt that 2nd one, cuz I def let myself get wrapped up in enough childish drama, but that tends to happen when all you do is hang w/ children.

That last comment has nothing to do w/ age, and everything to do w/ state of mind. I've been on a higher level, some of ya'll will never catch up, and I can live w/ that.

What I refuse to live w/, however, is a life full of unhappiness. I'm already battling the demons of my own depression/bi-polar issues. Do you have any idea what that's like? Or what it's like when 10 pounds of added pressure are applied, via drama? Never in a million years could I explain it to you. In all honesty, my mind is fucked up beyond belief, and getting you all to overlook that fact is hard enough. But I've been getting by on bottled anger my entire adult life. Don't slow me down now. Maybe I'm wrong about wanting someone to listen to ME, for once. I don't want to open up. I don't think any of you are ready for what I'd have to say.

You weren't even ready for this, and this is the smallest step I could take w/o leaving you behind.

Before I end this, I just have to throw in there that no ones friendship should change b/c of this. Not w/ me, anyway. I love you all the same as before I opened this blog. I really wish I didn't have to clarify how non-specific/personal this is, but I know it'll escape your muddled minds sooooo....

I love you. Leave it at that.

This ain't a scene, it's the goddamn oceanfront....

For Virginia Beach being so small, there's a lot of beefs and random "I hate ___" going around. Considering we ALL know each other. There is no person in VB worth knowing that I don't know thru some other person, or even if we've never met, I know 1/2 their friends, etc etc.. If you live here, or ever have, you know what I mean... It applies to pretty much 1/2 my friends list..

So many times in the past few weeks, I've run into mutual friends that I didn't know existed to the other person.. How in the hell.. Even beyond VB.. I know mad people in P-Town, Norfolk, Chesapeake... The 757 is just too small for words...

Myspace is making that more apparent.. Plenty of msgs sent to others like, HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW _____, and so many sent to me..

What a wonderful world.....

Those thieving birds....

Exhibit some strange behaviour...

When I'm paranooooooid, I see walls, behind walls, behind waaaaaaaaaaaaaallssss....

How many times do I have to say that I heart Daniel Johns? Really... This time it's brought on by the fact that I'm taking my fave Silverchair and Incubus songs from diff cds and making a 1/2 and 1/2 skeet-fest... I will prob slit my wrists to this cd one day, but I can def "live" w/ that...

*shivers*

Oh, this is sooooo gooood...

Ghost.

I feel a gravitational pull....

Or is that just someone taking a grav???

What a weekend. Cinco de Mayo! Woohoo! Didn't end up playing air hockey til Sun, but as you may've read.. I WON..

Sorry, Craig, but I had to throw that in there...

Anyway, I didn't get drunk on 5/5... Not that it's surprising tho.. No one ever sees me drunk, they just see me drinking. Someone's drama always, ALWAYS,

A-L-W-A-Y-S

–adverb 1. every time; on every occasion; without exception: He always works on Saturday.
2. all the time; continuously; uninterruptedly: There is always some pollution in the air.
3. forever: Will you always love me?
4. in any event; at any time; if necessary: She can always move back with her parents.

ALWAYS ------> interrupts my drinking. NEVER fails. The night I cracked dude w/ the pool stick? Sssssoooooooo on my way to being wasted, but nooooo.. And not long after I declared that I wasn't gonna even try to get a buzz @ T-Rav's party, while playing drinking games, DURING MY FIRST BEER, some shit popped off.. Just a minor spat in comparison, but a spat nonetheless...

Thanks, guys. Love that. Every time. Preesh!

So, I give up.. Why ask why? Try Bud Dry.. Or don't.. Just stay sober, or get high as fuck and ignore it all. Don't worry about apologizing LADIES (jic it gets twisted on who's to blame lol), b/c I'm not mad, regardless of how the above paragraphs sound lol.. Just making a statement, is all!

Ooh, btw.. Sat @ Tiki.. Mucho fun and maybe I should've stayed...? I def would've been wasted.. Everyone else seemed to be in the pics.. Dudes w/ girly shirts, etc... Haha..

I said what what! In the butt!

Also, to top off the weekend, we went to Danielle & Jeremy's apt after hanging out @ Craig, Grace, Ben, Ryan, and Chris.. Wait, and Stevo, but he was already long gone when we left.. That Jew bastard can't even share his spare time w/ a nigga...

Anyway, I had a lot of fun over there, esp after I crushed that spaghetti.. I had help, but I don't like the person who helped me @ this point in time so HER NAME shall not be mentioned in this bulletin!

Jeremy had us watchin' some fucked up videos tho, that's fa shoooo.. Dudes gettin knocked out l&r, hit by cars and shit.. Good stuff!

"Powder your vagina" haha Pickens I totally raped you for that, btw, but it's worth sharing..

We took pics over there, b/c DUH, it's Danielle and she had the camera out.. I hope she uploads them today (Feel the pressure, Dani.. I'm def applying it lol).. Larry and I took a few cute ones, so I want to see just how Fattastic I look..


K so yeah.. That's all for now.. Sharing my thoughts on the weekend, and what not.. What uuuuuuup to everyone I saw, and <3 to those I didn't.. Maybe next weekend...

HUNGER'S BDAY PARTY, AWWWWWWW SHIT.... K so maybe I WILL get drunk.. Drama prevented me from achieving it @ his last shindig, but this is a bday party.. Way diff.. LEE HOPEFULLY WON'T HAVE TO KNOCK ANYBODY ON THEIR ASS, HM?

OR YOU, LARRY.. I KNOW ya'll niggas will be up to no good..

Tsk, tsk...

Back in the days when I was young, I'm not a kid anymore, but somedays I sit and wish I was a kid again....

Another awesome night under the belt...

Boy! What a night! I love Pungo! Lol.. It's been so long since I've partied out in the BOONIES... Like, let's let off some shots type boonies..

Which explains the gun powder residue on my hand, if any of you work CSI-style lol...

God, we were all sooooooooooooooooooooooo ridiculously dying all night.. I had the gator runnin! Nothin' but jokes, stories, and stupid ass comments... Ya'll know... OMFG, Lauren... So much shit said last night that I can't remember.... Def wish it was all on tape.. There were like, 5 "spirit sticks" passed around during the night, plus mad beer and liquor, so you knowwwwwwwww we were all off the rip...

I don't even remember who all was there.. It was like 10 of us, right? Jeff squared (two!), dudeman, other dudeman... Rick...? Me, Jess, Lauren, Nicky, Dylan..... Some other dude.. They were all cool as a bitch tho.. I always enjoy people who tell me I'm the funniest bitch ever :D haha.. Naaaarciiiissiiiiist.... Don't blow my head up anymore, please! But thank you! I was so giddy after that, lol. Always makes me smile...

Another thing that rocked was the view! The sky was awwwwesome, and I was pretty much lost in it for the first lil bit... It had the bluesy colors that I love so much! The ones that look illuminated by a nightlight lol.. Beautiful.. I def plan on kickin' it next time there's a get-together.. Unless it's today...

Only 9 am and I already feel the heat.. Esp after finding out that T-Rav has to work, which means his shit won't be starting til around WHAT? THE TIKI TIME??? MOOOOORE THAN LIKELY!

Also, just have to throw this in there.. Dylan MOST DEFINITELY threw Jessica into the lake.. IIIIIII would've felt too trife for words.. So did she.. Tried to take his head off.. Too funny...

Hm, what else? Oh, I officially want this to happen.. After a few slow burns, I came to the conclusion that it would be JUST AWESOME! if you could just like, blast off Gummi Bear style into outer space, and have a friend meet you halfway so they can see how incredible the earth looks from there! I would love it! I'm surprised I even remember saying it!

Ooh, and for music, Nicky and Jeff 1 or 2 went ALL THE FUCKING WAY INTO TOWN FOR SOME GODDAMN BATTERIES.. FUUUUUUCK music if I gotta drive all the way thru Pungo and back just to jam.. We were yappin' it up the entire time, as if we never heard of music.. It took them sooooooooo fucking long to get back, LMMFAO.. I was dying.. I def woulda told someone to kiss my ass.. But it was her idea, so... W/e..

Mothafuck that shit...

Anyway, the music was like, mad old Bone Thugs, old ass DMX, shit like that.. Woooooooo.... I. Was. JAMMING. Let me tell you...

OMFGJHSDJKGLKFDHGLJKSDH THE PICTURES! WE ARE SOOOOOOOO GAY, but we took like 30 pics.. Esp of me, Dylan and dudeman w/ the guns.. We don't go nowhere w/o our pistol, pistols.. You all will see as SOON as Nicky uploads them bitches, trrrrrrrust meeeee.. I really want to see the shoulder pic.. My retarded ass was like, "OK LET'S STAND LIKE THIS... AND NOW THIS... K SO NOW YOU STAND OVER THERE... NO, LISTEN TO ME!!!" bwahahaha...

Every dude got a dick in her moooooouth.... Would've LOVED some Kingspade/KMK to be playing during that lovely event.. Any Noize really.. As soon as they got the campfire going, all I could think of was "If this was the last joint that we ever rolled up tiiiight.. I'd want to be w/ good friends underneath that open skyyyy..." Oh, god.. I <3 Rip The Night Awaaaaaaayyyyyy... Richter's part prob woulda killed me.. I was feeeeeeeeelin' it, nigga.. Feeeeelin' iiiiiiitttttt....

And now I'm feelin' some CSI on dvd, sooooo I'm out...

"I told myseeeeelf I wouldn't let you back in..."

"But here I aaammmm, dialing, trying...."

My throat hurts SO - SO - SO - SO bad right now... Unbelievable.. Didn't go to either show b/c the smoke would've KILLED me.. 'Bout to have to break Brandi's heart for tonight b/c there's no way I can go where she wants to go and not have my throat just cave into my neck by the time we leave.. Too much smoke!

I already highly regret the fact that we kicked it @ Brent's house.. If you know Brent, you know why my throat is even worse now, lol...

That sounds bad, so uh, I'm just gonna leave on that one...

DGAF... Kingspade tour.. Souljaz, oh my! Cannot wait!

Oh, and the 311 lyric as a subject remiiiiiiiinds me.. I was so happy earlier... Nicky and I were walking to a meter, and I was randomly singing 311.. We walk into Phils (stayed for all of like, 10 mins.. Fuck whatchu hearrrrrrrrd, the throat is GONE) and 311 - 123 (yes, that's a band and a title, for those unknowing) is on.. Iiiiiiiiii was jammin' like a sonuvabitch.. Such a delight!

Plus, the Braves were winning! lol

My life as I know it...

is apparently close to an end.. WHY DOES MY STOMACH HURT SO MUCH RIGHT NOW? And it's like, meat-hurt.. Hard to explain to anyone w/o an ulcer tho... Or, one like mine.. A lot of beef = a lot of stress for my stomach, and Brandi bought me this dank ass burger from Ruby Tuesday last night, which I promptly FUCKED up...

WHY! I knew it was going to hurt the next day... Grr..

There are two shows tonight.. Destroying John Bolshevic @ Jew Moms, and then Duburbia @ Half Shell.. If this pain doesn't subside soon, my ass ain't goin' NOOOOOOOOWHEEEEEEERE no time soon... I need some Mylanta, niggas.. If you're heading to the oceanfront, grab that bottle, and bring it to Blue Horseshoe, k? Thanks, preeeeeesh...