The One W/ The Year-End Blog.

Some things are better left unsaid. Of course, no one told ME that until it was too late.

Gooooooooood mornin', Vietnam! Happy New Year, good fucking riddance 2007. By the time I post this, it won't be '08 yet, but still.. You get the fucking point.

I seriously don't even know wtf to start, there's soooooooo much shit to talk about...

Let's see.. The start of the year, immeeeeeediate bang w/ Lauren's near-arrest over her suspended license (unbeknownst to her), which sent Brandi and I over the edge to the point where WE almost got arrested... I got your back, homie.. I got your back for life!

But that wasn't always the case w/ some of you...... To me, 2007 = maaaad betrayal. All sorts of friend/relationships got fucked up this year... Good god.. We alllll had our shady ass moments... Or just moments in general... THANKS TO GRIFF, I had mine mad early, got that alllll outta the way... Not that Brandi and I didn't butt heads on like 10 other things, but none were as important... I'm @ a campsite w/ the Richmond boys straight gettin' snapped on via celly, aww.. I ♥ you, Ninja...

Whiiiiiiiich brings me to the BEACH CREW portion of the blog.....

Like I said before, if this is how you treat family, I'm gooooooood on THAT.... I can't wait to see who's NOT @ Scandals come NYE... Nobody's perfect, forgive and forget etc etc blah blah...............

Cuz I done heard some shiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttt about ya'll... Not all of you, no.. I got mad love for those who know........ BUUUUUUUUUT some of you bitches are downright TRIFLIN' and your time in the spotlight will come.

Names??? Oh, YOU KNOOOOWWWWWWWW..... Just not who you think, b/c you're too busy still passing judgement on that, EEEEEVEN THO YOU'RE A DIRTY LIL CUNT YOUR DAMN SELF.....

Moving right along.... l.o.v.e/h.a.t.e

Lower case, niggas. Bitches betta get it right...........

This year, maaaaad random hook-ups happened... I walk w/ Josh (Sherrrrrrrrman) to grab his tattoo shit, and BAM! I find out this nigga is dating/living w/ Shay.... Say whaaaaaaaat!?!? That's another couple who've been thru some SHiT this year... Josh, ♥ ya, we cool, etc... But fuck up ONE 'MO 'GIN, and I'mma busssssss yo head to the white meat.... You were up to no good, aaaaaaand you know it.. BUT! You've more than redeemed yourself, and I wish ya'll nothin' but the best, and a lack of DRAMA. Don't get yourself caught up w/ them lil floozies the REST of your boys can't seem to keep their dicks out of..................

SHE'S MY BEEEEEEEST FRIEND'S GIIIIIIRL...!

Shay, good LAAAAAAWDY, did we get close as fuck or WHAT!?!?! Seriously, ya'll have provided the both of us w/ SOOOOOOO much to talk about, it's unreal. Don't tell us secrets. I'm tellin' HER, and she's tellin' ME, haha.. Flaaaaaaat the fuck out... And just shit from THIS YEAR, wooo... Our friends have been awfully busy... Some w/ each other, some w/ each other's other....... *snicker* .....

There's a-LOT of dots in this blog...

Ahhhhh yesssss.... What a year, hm? It's the year that I just stopped giving a fuck about ERRRRRBODY, friends included. Not literally, just in terms of, ok you pissed me off, not mincing words just b/c you're my boy/girl... Sometimes you just gotta let it flow... I've suffered faaaaar too much unhappiness just trying to be the good friend, etc. Why, I do not know, esp since half of you take my friendship for granted as is. Apparently Becca assumed that b/c I love her, I wasn't gonna dig into her ass each and every time she did some dumb shit. HOOOOOOORRIBLY WRONG, but that's ok! We live and we learn... And by we, I mean everyone BUT her, hahaha.. ♥

This year basically proved that white bitches never listen/learn from shiiiiiitttttt.. Not just the one I just mentioned, but she also shares the crown.

Errrrrrrrrr!!!! Niggas is SIMPS, too... Go and brush your shoulders off... I know mad dudes that got played this year. Some from the same female, haha. By show of hands, who WASN'T listening when BBD said "never trust a big butt and a smile"??? Apparently ALL of you. I don't care how much "you love her and can't live w/o her", sometimes, YA JUST FUCKIN' NEED TO... The best part about this year is that 99.9% of the drama and betrayal was flat-out BOLD PRINT in people's faces, but some poor humans can't face the truth so they live, marry, and sometimes re-marry a lie. I hope to GOD someone kills me before my life is marred by deceit. Dooooooon't... Don't let me be the laaaaaast to knoooooooowwww...

I wonder if Britney sang that to Jamie Lynn???

I wonder if ______ sang it to ____?? I knew like the day before, maaaaaaaybe two days before she did, but I didn't KNOWWWWW know.. I just kinda knew.. I still regret not saying anything, but it was hearsay.....

Meaning I heard it, and said it to someone else, just not her. Ooh, all I want to talk about is DRAMA. I swear, it permiated sooooooo much of my year, that it's just naturally gonna come up every other paragraph. Plus, we've all been some dirty ass mafakas this year, and I want everyone involved to read this and marinate in their own private shame. Maybe they can print it out and read it on the way to FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA....

K enough of the cheap digs... I'm going for the expensive stab.

Speeeeeeaking of FL however, DEFFFF had some of the best times EVERRRRRR w/ Brandi and G-riffic.. Dew Tour? Ah-sum. Metal Mulisha signing? Ah-summmmmmm-errrrrrr... I really want a BBQ sammich from the Lakeland Ale House, and while I'm there I'll knock Mi Vida Loca on her ass, maybe scrub off some of that Plaster Caster lookin' ass mold of a face she wears to work..

Fresh off my own spiteful comment, I MUST make mention of the insanely high amount of spite spewed from the lips of some of my besties... Look @ Jessica.... Even before the recent events that occured (btw, she's DEF in jail thru the New Year), her name could neverrrrrrr be brought up w/o SOMEONE saying something spiteful. We're all a band of fuck-ups, we just pick and choose which ones we focus on. Nicky is another one that catches a lot of shit. Not to her face, NOOOO, we're not THAT brave..... And even when they are, it's "hahajustkiddingeventhoimnot"... The "eventhoimnot" part is silent. We ALLLL talk mad shit, plain and simple, but everyone acts so fucking Puritan when other people get called out for it. It's one of our country's favorite pastimes, like blatant racism/stereotyping and homophobia.

The unwritten rules for that type of thing is it's ok, so long as you don't get caught doing it. I think masturbation, nose-picking, and eating off the floor all fall under that same category. All three disgust me. Yeah, I said it. Masturbation should be a solely spectator sport. I don't know how that works for the person DOING it, but I'll find the loophole.

After all, I found my true passion, my reason to grow the fuck up... If the pen is mightier than the sword, then what is the keyboard??? TJ, I love you. You and Shay kick-started my QUITE OBVIOUS neeeeeed to write. I think that if I lost a hand, I'd commit suicide. Not even think, I KNOW. I almost don't want to fight ever again, jic...

Minus last night. DEF was about to wreck a bitch.... I LOVE how all those bitches scattered the moment I walked up.... And I LOOOOVE Lauren's little jackmove for the front-row, haha.. But I'm not talking about that, I'll get people in trouble. I mean, the word will get out either way, buuut.... If I didn't say it first, it doesn't count! :D

I wish I'd thought up the Gossip Girls series.. I could guest-write in a book.. I've done seen some shit go down that I would loooooooooooooove to talk about in a non-tattling way.. Def seen enough tattling take place this year, haha.. I'm good on THAT for the next couple eons..

WOOOOOOOOW, the year is over... It's really just now hitting me for real, thanks to the That 70's Show moment I just had in the garage in front of Stevo's heater w/ the radio on Bob FM... Awwwwwriiiiiight... Damn, now I want to watch Dazed & Confused... Ugh...

Listening to Silverchair, my fingers will prob never stop now...

"I'll only maaaaaake you cryyyyyy w/ these feeeeeeeeliiiiiiiiiiiins...." Aaaaand I feel myself ready to launch into an episode, forgive me fahja, for I have sinned...

Sooooooo Clutch came by here a lil while ago and we chatted out front.. He claims he's tired of trying to be nice to everyone, b/c it just blows up in his face, etc....

REEEEEEEEALLY, HAVEN'T I BEEN SAYING THAT TO YOU THIS ENTIRE TIME!!??! I told him to just go ahead and be nice when he wants to, fuck it, right??? He won't do it, but I gotta keep telling him just so I can say I did, lol.. This whole him and _____ thing is getting a lil weird, hm? LOL.. ♥

GURRRRRRRY! YOU'RE IN TOWN, YOU RAT BASTARD... THANKS FOR TELLING ME WHEN YOU KNEW I WOULDN'T REMEMBER, HAHA...

Ok soooooooo what else.. GOD, so much shit happened this year.. The Mercers are wild'n! I broke someone's leg w/ a pool stick... Lauren broke her hand on a wall, haha... Jessica's in JAIL, Brandi's got a 2 year old, lmmmmfao... I think she wins the Most Random title, b/c all the others could be sorta predicted.. I fuck people up anyway, Lauren stay throwin' and punchin' shit, and Jessica, well.... We all know Jessica... Whiiiiich is a lie, a good portion of you don't... Well, she's in my Top.. Mortified Penguin, lol.. Awwwwww, now I want to play Splinter Cell..

My mind just went absolutely blank. What the FUCK!

Ohh, so uhh.. I did a lot more traveling... I've decided that The Steve Miller Band - Jet Airliner is my theme song for life. That, and KMK - Endless Highway.. I don't know what it is, but GOD it feels good to get away from here. Even if only for a day or two.. I was in NY last weekend, I think it was.. Just b/c.. Almost went to New England this weekend. REALLY wish I had, lol. Morgan wants to go home, and I want to get away. How perfect? And thennnnn I could stop by and see my favorite Massholes, haha. Take some more pics in the desolate town I once called home.

Byyyyyyyy the way, I seriously seeeeeeeriously either need A. that fuckin' Fly Pentop shit or B. a fucking tape recorder.. But I'd much rather see it in type b/c I can still get my own emphasis after the fact, I just need to remember the actual details..

Uh-ohhhh, presto chang-o, I'm not writing this blog anymore.. Why? B/c no one fucking listens anyway... I wasted so much of my time and energy this year trying to help the blind see, and it got me nowhere but mad fuckin' frustrated, soooooo you get no witty epithats, nothing. You get to sit and sulk, just like I do when you bombard me w/ your fucking problems that you REALYL don't want a solution to or else you'd stop being such a jackass... I can't count how many times this year I had someone tell me I was right, long after I told THEM I was going to be, or w/e the sitch was... It wouldn't be as irritating if people wouldn't say "Oh, I know" after you tell them something, only to have their actions show how they either DIDN'T know, or DID, but didn't care. THAT also got mad annoying... Stop crying me a river if you're just gonna mop it up w/ lemon Pine-Sol to make it all sunny and clear, ooooonly to have the inevitable happen and once again, I'm shin-deep in sadness having NOTHING to do w/ me...

After much mental review, I don't like this year so much... TOO much drama that wasn't mine, which I obv take partial blame for b/c I don't haaaave to listen, but I have difficulties flipping the switch.

Sooooooo, I'm not gonna make any bold resolutions to change or w/e b/c for all the things about me that have changed, I'm still the same kid w/ the cheesy smile. The things I needed to change, like NOT being an asshole for the sake of some bullshit, that's over w/... I did enough awesome things to make myself feel better about life, so fuck it.. Bring me a new year, just 12 more months to fuckin' conquer and do shit you never thought I could do, so whaaaaatevuh, man.. Let's get it crackin!

Ohhh, wait. I know what I DO want to do finally, and what I WILL be doing thanks to my Ma.. I caaaaaaaannooooooot stress how over MYSELF and my own bullshitting that I am.. This can't go on.. I mean, it WILL, but not as severe!

Aaaahhhhh soooo Griff is here, I'm just gonna end it.. I don't want anything prolific, etc like I said..

It's just words, right???



WROOOOOOONG, these words are gonna propell me to where I want to be.. These words make me happy, happier than I've been in ages, so uhh..

K can't end this.. I realized that I had little crushes on certain people, some I just want to stop bullshittin'..... I did the math, you don't add up. Whaaaat-ever, in the new year I ain't got tiiiiiiiiime to focus on shit like that. I want so badly to stick to my plans....

OH, SHIIIIIIT.... LOVE.. Back to love again... LOVE IS RETARDED, LOVE IS A DEATH TRAP, LOVE IS MOOT.

Some of THE dumbest, most psycho/dramatic moments of my LIFE came in the name of love... Not ME, heeeeell NAH, but I done seen some shit that would make your stomach turn..

BLAH BLAH EIDOGJOLDJHGOIEJGOIDJOGJDSG I AM STOPPING NOW B/C I DON'T FEEL LIKE THE PEOPLE WHO SHOULD BE TAKING WHAT I HAVE TO SAY TO HEART WILL EVEN BE LISTENING, SO FUCK IT...

GOODBYE, TWO-THOUSAND SEVEN.

Seriously, what in the hell...

Did I do to recieve horrible service EVERYWHERE!?!

I was just thinking about last Sat when I got the grossest eggs possible @ Denny's (Rosemont).. Not only that, but what did I do to deserve the same exact response from Lauren every single time. As a friend, I am BEGGING YOU to never chime in ever again when I am voicing a food-related complaint. As I have said MANY, MANY times to ALL of my friends who've worked in that industry - I DON'T GIVE A SINGLE SOLITARY FUCK about where YOU worked, and how they did it, etc.. I DGAF whooooo's fault it is, b/c I know for a fact that it's not MINE. It seriously irritates me more than the food fuck-up when people constantly have something to say, as if A, they cooked my meal, or B, I GIVE A FUCK. I am thisclose to punching the next person - WHOEVER IT MAY BE - in the mouth for even considering to argue against me when it ISN'T YOUR PLACE TO SPEAK B/C I AM NOT TALKING TO YOU/ABOUT YOU.

DISHG;ISHJGKDKSLJG;SDKH JUST STFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ALREADY, GOD.. People seriously need to learn when to STFU.. Not just around me, which would be AWESOME btw, but in general. If you have nothing valid to say, please.... Talk to someone else stupid, my brain is on dumb-overload.

But back to the food.. Morgan has become my official order person b/c she can say it w/o getting irritated, lol.. We usually both explain how I want the food, b/c I just haaaaave to stress the anger that will be soon to follow if it's wrong.. We tell this bitch about the eggs.. LIGHTLY SCRAMBLED.. FLUFFY.. ZERO COARSENESS, 0, ZILCH.. I DO NOT like coarse eggs.. They should be yellow all around, not partially brown.. Even if it's just a leeeeeeeeettle bit, I can handle that b/c I always eat my center eggs and leave the COARSE OUTSIDES alone.. We explain all of that, tell her that I will not eat it if it comes out wrong.. And that I want crispy but not burnt bacon.. She runs the order back, I concur, that's that...

PLEASE... FOR THE LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE OF GOD, HELP ME UNDERSTAND HOW MY SHIT CAME OUT 10000000000000% WRONG... And while you're explaining, grab your shotgun..

My eggs are brown ALL OVER, to the point where I can hold them up w/o them falling apart.. SOOOOOO HARD and trife, omfg.. I immediately get pissed off, but I told the waitress that I'm not mad @ HER, that the cook is the fuck-up.. All that good shit.. This is where _____ chimes in b/c god FORBID she has nothing to say about something 100% not involving her, lol.. I'm trying to talk to the waitress while telling the Child Wonder to stfu b/c I'm not talking to her/not HER food sooooooo... OEFLGHJH;LDSGL;DFHKLSJDG I AM NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU NOT TALKING TO YOU N O T T A L K I N G T O Y O U. SHUUUUUUUUUUUUT THEEEEEEEEE FUUUUUUUUUUUCK UUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't know how many times/ways I can stress that, but there's my best shot of the moment. Grr.

ANYWAY, I'm getting more and more pissed off the more Lauren is talking to me b/c I seriously DO NOT and REFUSE to grasp the concept that a person can ASK YOU SPECIFICALLY WHAT YOU WANT and deliver anything BUT. Why are you writing it down??? Are you actually going to get it right!?!? Why is it that in food service, people are allowed to do the least amount of their job!? You took a job as a COOK, a cook who has NO CHOICE but alter my meal to my liking... People act like I asked him to make me fucking filet mignon (AND EVEN IF I DID.......)... IT'S CHEESE EGGS... GET IT RIGHT....!!!!!!!

And THEN the same chirping little bird asks me why I bother eating out if I'm going to complain.................................

WWWWWHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY SHOULD I BE FORCED TO EAT @ HOME/WHEREVER JUST B/C SOMEONE DOESN'T WANT TO DO THEIR JOB!??!?!?! If this was TACO BELL not giving us steak & nacho cheese ONLY Chalupas, you'd have a BF... IT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING, JACKASS, FOOD SERVICE IS FOOD SERVICE.. IF THIS IS WHAT I ASKED FOR, FUCKING GIVE IT TO ME, THANKS PREEEEEEEESH. NO excuses, just fucking DO IT...

Am I picky!?? YES, BUT I DGAF... I want what I want, and that's it.. WHYYYYY would I order and BE EXPECTED TO PAY AMERICAN CURRENCY for food I don't want!?!? I seriously don't get it, to the point where I just want to slap all parties involved... ____ called me earlier on lunch when she was pulling up to Taco Bell, and def said that she would flip the fuck out if her food is wrong...

HELLO, MS CONTRADICTION 2007, THAT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING I AM IRRITATED ABOUT, SO WHY DO YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUU GET TO COMPLAIN, BUT I'M SUPPOSED TO EAT IT???

OH NO WAIT, LEMME SEE.. "IS IT THAT BIG OF A DEAL???" "IF YOU KNOW IT COULD COME OUT WRONG, WHY WOULD YOU ORDER IT???"

ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU SAY TO ME!?!?!? EAT IT AND STFU THEN, LMFAO...

I love her, seriously, but that shit is maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad annoying.

Can't you tell?? It's not even just her, STEVO does it, along w/ pretty much everyone else, but only the two of them feel the need to say the same thing every fucking time.. Morgan feels me knockin, so I'ma let her in.. She will have a response to this, I bet.. She watches as the anger bubbles w/ every passing word/excuse...

OMFG, I am so irritated right now, lmmfao...

BASICALLY, THIS IS WHAT I WANT......

1. FOR NO ONE TO EVER EVER EVERRRRRRR SAY ANYTHING TO ME/THE SERVER/ANYONE ELSE WE'RE W/ ABOUT HOW AND WHAT I'M ASKING FOR.

2. FOR NO ONE TO EVER EVER EVERRRRRRR SAY ANYTHING TO ME/THE SERVER/ANYONE ELSE WE'RE W/ ABOUT MY COMPLAINTS IF AND WHEN MY FOOD IS FUCKED UP.

3. FOR YOU ALL TO REALIZE THAT LIKE I SAID, I DON'T WANT TO FUCKING HEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE/WHERE YOU USED TO COOK/ETC, B/C IT HAS NOOOOOOOOOOOTHING TO DO W/ THE POINT I AM MAKING, WHIIIIIIIIIICH BRINGS ME TO NUMBER 4, A B/T TWO FRIENDS I RECENTLY WITNESSED...

4. FOR YOU ALL TO REALIZE THAT NOOOOOTHIIIIIIIING IN LIFE IS MORE ANNOYING THAN WHEN IIIIIIIII AM ARGUING A POINT, AND SOMEONE ELSE ARGUES BACK W/ A POINT THAT ISN'T THE FUCKING POINT.

You sound stupid as FUCK for the entire convo, for one, and secondly, IF THAT'S NOT WHAT IIIIIIII AM SAYING, THEN STFU. Nothing else matters until my point is heard and understood, esssssp not in MY own eyes. I could gaf less what you're trying to convey until you get the ORIGINAL POINT, and if you don't, SAY IT, don't stand there like an idiot repeatedly yelling about the color blue when I'm WATCHING The Color Purple...

It's not TOMATO/TO-MA-TO, IT'S STFU B/C I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG, END OF STORY/SENTENCE/LIFE/PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERIOD.



Still one of the best clips EVER.

I am the black Rosie O'Donnell.

SHUT UP, TJ, don't say a word!



PS, that little clip is for you, ____. Just to show that I love you oh-so-much, and it's really not JUST you.. Just sometimes, lol. ♥

Ugh, I need my Braves slipper socks...

Cuz it's cold as a BITCH out this mafaka...

BUT OMFG WHO CARES, I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE W/ RIIIIIIIIIIIIIICOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

How awesome is that!??! I told him how we all miss him etc etc.. He's in goddamn OHIO, where it's 15 degrees.. Have fun w/ that one.. He just wrote Lauren's number down in some damn snow.. Bitch please.. Lauren, I love you, but fuck all that.. I could never forget your number anyways... I've dialed it more than ANY other number in the past 4 years.. Probably combined while you bullshit.. Or texted it.. DEF got that on lock.. We stay chit chattin, lol.. And tonight we're doing the lights @ Botanical Gardens, then returning to Kim's (house/pet-sitting) to watch Xmas shit.. Family time, per usual.. We do this every year! We're supposed to bake @ Gmas here soon.. And of course, we'll go to her Mas and do the same thing.. Tradition, baby!

Oh, and I think I'm gonna ask Kim if I can write the book here.. I need a constant place to write w/ a clear head, and this would be perfect.. We'll see how that goes.. I'm sure she'll say yes! I hope so!

K, I had a lot to say but it's too cold in this room for me to remember any of it, so I'm out..

PPPPPPSSSSSSS ty Morgan for the 49ers PJs you're making for me.. I can't wait to rock'em w/ the fully non-matching slipper socks.. IF my ma finds them.. When she moved she packed them away and has no idea where.. @ least they're together tho, b/c I haven't even worn them yet..

Ohh, maybe this isn't ending... Celina and Chris (MA) called me last night!! Drunk as fuck, btw.. That was awesome.. Such a random delight... There's only a few reasons to ever miss MA, and they are apart of it.. I wouldn't move back, but I def want to visit.. Morgan wants to drive up to NE so I guess it can go down then.. I just hope it's in the spring, cuz fuck a buncha that bullshit.. Althooooooooo I guess you're not getting the full essence w/o the snow and shit.. I don't think I've ever visited my Gma (CT) w/o it being cold as FUCK.. It's usually a Thanksgiving thing, so I know it was always cold lol..

Aaaaaaaand now I feel awfully chatty... I'm hungry as a bitch and this ugly ass cat keeps tryna buck on my food.. I'll make gloves out of you, nigga! Ugly ones, but gloves nonetheless...

BRRRRRRRRRRATTTTTT!

Ooooooooohhhhhh so I deffffffff def need to stop playin' and get those videos on my phone online.. It's killing me.. I really want to make a random ass movie w/ all that stufffffffffffffuuuuuuuucccccckkkkkkk yes and then put it on a disc.. I don't care how random it is.. I also need to erase all the pics on my phone, or @ least the ones I already uploaded.. I thought I did, but.. Hm, lemme check.. Nope.. So I need to put my card in @ my Mas and take the ones I haven't yet off, and then just wipe the whole pic slot clean.. There's def like 350 on here now, if not more.. I stay takin' pics of random shit, just like I used to when I was buckin' on all them single-use cameras bitd...

Raaaaaaaawwwwwwwwrrrrrrrrrr, btw b/c 311 is coming in March.. I want to go.. Last year was so fun! It's all the way in Richmond tho, so I dunno how that's gonna go down.. Not only that, but I pretty much gave up on making anything in my life concrete b/c the shit changes up so drastically, it's unreal. HOPEFULLY I can go, all I'ma say.. If I make it certain, someone will see fit to change that, soooo.. I'll just play it safe...

Uhh, ok I'm really hungry/cold, so I'm gonna end it for real this time.. I'll prob be back on later, after I watch Half Nelson (mmm) soooooooooo yeah.. Later, bitches!

This isn't the blog I want it to be, but...

I'm not too worried about it. I really just wanted to say that the book is coming along, and there's more of a set format now, soooo...

I do believe that elevation of the mind will help me finish faster... It's not NEARLY done, I've got soooo much to say, lol.. But like I said, it's coming along..

So apparently I'm writing reviews now...

Brandi called me in the middle of the night (which I missed) to tell me that there's a review in the Sub Noize mag that I wrote.. I remember writing it, I just forgot allll about it afterwards.. That's awesome..

Not that it's the first I've written.. I was dabbling in review writing a few years ago, lol. Last two were Hanson and KMK, when their albums came out on the same day..

Maybe that's what I should do.. Critique shit, since I've got oh-so-much to say about everything, lol..

I need to scan that review.. Aw.. I'm so gay!

As many of them damn mags I've held/passed out, I def don't recall seeing that. Prob b/c I only skimmed the most recent one...

Hm, guess I should pay more attention...

I want to find my soulmate...

Problem is, I really don't see this happening...

Everyone I know has their ideal soulmate, that person that fully completes them, etc etc. In fact, some of you are soulmate-swapping, but that's ok. There's someone for everyone, even if that someone is all one person, lol.

I got nothin' but looooove 'fo ya, baby...

But anyway, back to my point... I really truly don't see it happening. Am I that scorned, to where I can't even imagine having someone to bleed it out w/??

When I listen to music, MY music, I can't imagine who else I'd listen to it w/.. There's a difference b/t listening to music w/ someone, and listening to music w/ someone w/ nearby.

I want someone to hit repeat for me. That's my ideal person. You want to hear the same song just as bad as I do, w/ the same fervent desire to hear it over and over... I'll never find that person tho..... C'mon now, we allllll know what specific band my significant other would HAVE to love, or never be near me when I'm listening to them. I don't even like listening to Silverchair w/ other people around b/c I feel like I'm just wandering thru the music while you sit quietly nearby, perched on thoughts of anything else but the current situation.

You always hear people say that they want someone to share their ideals w/, but I HIGHLY doubt that motherfucker is walking into my life ANY time soon. I can barely keep my friends around w/ all of my opinions on things, what makes me think I won't be that same apparently intolerable dickhead to *you*?? That last part just makes me want to rant about the idiots I constantly deal w/, but the song remains the same, and my ears are ringing due to overkill. Sooooo, I'll just let that one go..

But uhhh... Yeah, like I said.. I would love to find someone to balance me out, but how can something so unbalanced have balance?? Wouldn't I need a few months (years) of therapy first?? I'm clearly off my rocker, and I don't want to bring someone else into the madness, lol.

Blah, blah, w/e... That was my stab @ being all introspective about anything remotely close to romantic.

Fuck you all still for being the same predictable, most drama-filled bitches I've ever had the displeasure to know, btw... Just thought I'd take the only road I've never traveled, see how it panned out, etc......

When I grow up, I want to be just like.....

Swear 'fo GOD, that nigga is just too ill. Just watch the video.. Look how UTTERLY EFFORTLESS it looks, esp for Jay.. Mariah? Chillin.. Nas? Chillin.. Diddy? Chillin..

It's coming..........

If for no other reason than to have my own efforts considered "utterly effortless".. What's awesome about that is the thing I'm instantly lauded for, the wit/quickness, most definitely comes w/ zero effort. LOL, maybe I SHOULD do stand-up, and I won't write my material down, just to complete the full circle, lol. If I can just get up there and talk, I'll be fine.

I ♥ motivation, esp when it has NOTHING to do w/ what I'M doing. But I AM a cool ass bitch, swayin' thru circles a warm summer breeze.. Oh, yes.

Like I said before, I have a lot of friends that are the shit, but not many have the essence/appeal for that type of thing.. It is, or it isn't.

And it is...... MY TURN!

"Oh, what a feelin', I'm feelin' life...."

Lie, Steal, Cheat, Love [pretty much a blog]

Lie, Steal, Cheat, Love
Body: ***L*I*E***

How often do you lie? Oh, GOD........... Not as much as you would think.. Some people just don't deserve the truth. Esp people who don't take the truth for what it is and just run w/ it. Tsk, tsk. A damn shame..

Are you a good lier? Is this a survey?

Do you get away with it? Depends.. Haha.. They'll figure it out before I'm done..

What is the worst (horrible) lie you have ever told? I don't know.

What is the worst (stupid) lie you have ever told? "I wasn't smoking!"

Are white lies okay? They're fucking perfect.

What is the last white lie you told? I hate drama, lol. I must fucking LOVE it... I def love it when THAT happens.. Mm, Shay.. I wish we had Walkie-Talkies..

Did you lie a lot when you were younger? To my parents? No.. Well, to my dad mostly. He never wanted me outside, or roughin' around w/ the boys, etc.. Ha.. And for damn good reason..

About what? Stupid shit, like why I didn't come inside when it started raining.. Did I break into that house?? What was I doing riding bikes all thru OV??? LOL.. Stooooooopid shit.. What did it matter!? Now I don't even talk to your fuckin' ass.. 'Cept but ONCE this damn year.. Love you too, nigga... Mafaka thought I lived in TEXAS.. WTF...

Did you fool your parents? Sure did.. I fooled them into thinking I was sane, apparently.

Have you ever been caught in a lie? Ohhh, boy.. Don't even get me started.. ALWAYS w/ my Ma, the dumbest shit.. That's why I don't even bother now.. It's so retarded.. Now w/ friends, haha.. Nigga, you knew when I said "No." LMMFAO.. I'll get to THAT in the blog soon to follow..

What was it all about? Her.

Do you have a guilty conscious? Nope.. You can't tell the truth sometimes. Not during that moment, anyway. It's a tightrope act.

How can someone tell when you are lying? we are one in the same, that is how they tell <----- TRUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEST OF ALL STORIES.... A-MOTHERFUCKIN-MEN.. I hear ya, bitch...

***C*H*E*A*T***


Do you cheat on tests? Ha, I don't even remember.. Prob not.. I just knew w/e I put down.. The math part of the test I took to end my lovely stay @ Job Corps, I stg I was bluffing in my head.. I went w/ what I felt like was right, and got like one of the highest scores in however long they told me it was..

Have you ever been caught cheating on a test? No..

Have you ever caught someone else cheating on a test? Hell yeah.. In BOARD GAMES, too..

Have you ever cheated on a bf or gf? Hm........

Have you ever been caught cheating on your bf or gf? Aaaaaaaaand that brings me toooooo.........

Would you ever cheat on your current bf or gf? What sucks is I'm not NOT answering these b/c I don't want to, it's b/c I am DYING to get the OTHER shit outta my head. Main reason I'm replying to this.. Talk about 'reply to sender'..

Would you ever cheat on them with some famous model/actor/actress? YA GODDAMN RIGHT and I can't wait to see LAUREN'S reaction to that ?... Haha, ya'll bitches know that's the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. OMFG I just thought of ______________________. YESSSSSSSSSS.

Even if you were completely sure you would never be caught? I don't give a FUUUUUUCK, I'll let you know, bitch.. Let Ryan Reynolds pop up.. BITCH, I'm out!

Have you ever been cheated on? I wouldn't gaf if I could just turn around w/ RR...

***S*T*E*A*L***

Have you ever stolen before? Haha, bitd I was mad klepto.. Stupid shit.. Single-use cameras from 7-11.. Magazines (that's why I HAD so many boy band/heartthrob pics), dumb shit like that.. Some people just can't help themselves tho... Some damn people..

If so what? I just told you.. DEF bucked on some spray that I gave to my sister's stickgirl tho.. From that wack ass party, matter'fact..

Do you think stealing is a serious crime? Obv it is, but niggas do dumb shit anyway...

What would you do if you caught someone stealing from you? HAHA, I dunno, let's find out.. If I re-arranged "The List" we could... *smirk*

Have you ever stolen someones heart? I want to steal it, and stomp on it. FUCK.

What was the last thing you stole? I got away w/ words......

Ever had anything stolen from you? Yes ma'am, I sure have...

If so, what? something very dear to me <--- That, amongst other things. Someone stole my ability to feel here recently.

What is one thing that you would steal if you could get away with it with NO consequences? Someone's life.

***L*O*V*E***

Are you currently in Love? W/ an obsession.

If so, with who? and you want to know this why? That person knows and that is the only person that needs to know. <---- Does that apply if you're in love w/ yourself??

When was the last time you were in love? I'm always in love w/ something......

How long does it take you to fall in love? Not long, it just takes forever for me to let you know..

How many times have you really been in love? Don't make me throw up...

Do you think there were times you thought you were in love when you werent? Aaaaand they caaaaalled it... Puppy loooooooooove...

How fast do you tell a significant other that you love them? You shouldn't. Don't ever do it again, lol.

How often do you tell your parents you love them? Almost everytime we speak.. Unless I'm pissed, and even then it's hopefully calmed to the point where I can say that..

How often do you tell your bf or gf? N/A.. Don't do it either way. It doesn't matter. If they're going to hurt you, it'll be reguardless.

Do you tell your friends? Ha, nah.. Well, depends..

Have you ever said I love you and not meant it? Sure have.

Have you ever said I love you but Im not in Love with you? That's so lame.. I've said it ABOUT someone tho..

Are you a slave to love? No, but that ol' slave mentality could kick in @ any moment! ;)

Do you love yourself? "Self-confidence can reach the point of grandiose delusion" Haha...

What is the best thing about Love? knowing that soul mates are for real and forever, that the one person that completes you is right there, you can feel their every mood, you can sit in silence and not have the radio on, the warmth that flows through you when you touch, the emptiness you feel when they aren't around, knowing that in the end nothing can touch your love for each other. <---- Does this apply for friendship??? Cuz damn... Some of ya'll got me in a bind behind being soulmates.. And THAT is true fuckin' story...

Ha, fuck another blog.. I'll save it for a fresh mind.. I'm tired..

FIN.

PS Amanda, this is the greatest quiz of all time...... currently.

Ya know, if I stopped blogging...

I'd PROBABLY get a book out in like 2 weeks.. Like I said, it'll be blog-style so all I'm gonna be doing is turning a gigantic series of blogs into a book.. No reader that hadn't previously read my blogs would get it if I did it any other way.. I don't want a memoir, I just want mass publication, lol. I fully plan on having a spot @ the end of the chapters w/ a song listed, or even a video you should watch.. I don't think I would even care about writing a book if I had like a million readers..

Maybe that should be the kick-start. Get more people to read my blogs, and then go from there. See what happenssssssssiiiiiiiiiike I still want a book, lmfao.. But I think I'm gonna change the title. I know I am, actually, b/c I want the original title to be a main chapter.. I dunno, I'm torn.. Eventually you'll all find out. And I swearrrrrr, if it IS a book and not just the blog, you better buy one for everyone you know, even if they bought YOU one..

Basically, make me rich.

Btw, the reason I'm torn hinges on one topic that I REALLY want to blog about oh-so-bad, but I want the opinion of the masses on that one, and I don't want to cheapen the experience by blogging it and THEN writing about it, even tho there's a million things that could've gone in the book had I not already went into blogger-land.

Grr..

I need to clean the kitchen, so I'm just gonna leave now.. Let me find a video, then I'm out.. Maybe I'll use the ringer I've been hearing for two days straight now, thanks to the proprietor of my Myspace name..

Got Love!

I've got PLENTY of love for the pics of Brandi and I, that's for sure.

Another blog turned hostile. Awesome.

Life hasn't really changed too much since my last blog.. CRAZY times, esp last night w/ everyone high outta their minds.. We "partied" for awhile @ Gmas, then a bunch of us went to Rick's Cafe @ like 2:40am lol.. Didn't leave til after 4, partially b/c the food took weeks.. Our fault tho, b/c there was def meeeee, Morgan, Lauren, Jessica, Brent, Rob, and Pat to cook for.. No idea what Brent, Rob, or Pat ordered, but my shit was simple as hell. MINUS the eggs which are apparently IMPOSSIBLE TO GET MADE RIGHT ANYWHERE...

CHEESE EGGS. SCRAMBLED. SOFT. FLUFFY.

NO ONE CAN DO IT THO... WTFFFFF... I think I'm the only person who makes eggs the way I like them.. I should start making eggs before I leave to eat breakfast @ a restaurant.. I just want my order right! And then, just like her BROTHER, each and EVERY TIME I gotta hear LAUREN pipe in about how it's not their fault etc etc, as if I ever ever everrrrrr asked for her thoughts on the matter, lmfao. They are my eggs, I know how I want them, I DGAF how many years you've worked w/ food (to EVERYONE who tells me about their old jobs etc) unless YOU are going to cook my eggs, ok? Awesome thanks lol. Don't tell me not to order eggs, tell THEM to get them right. If I was standing next to them, they'd get it right. I'm not gonna become a cook just to get good eggs once in awhile..

I love how EVERYONE makes me listen to them bitch over what is usually the pettiest shit, but everytime I want to, I get treated like I'm just being an asshole. I'm about over all that, fa shooooooo...

Esp when it's usually people who say they will tell anyone anything blah blah I'm so hard... WEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLL NOT MANY OF YOU ARE SHOW & PROVING, SOOOOO......

Oh, well. I've got a bunch of pussyfooters.. It's my burden, I love them, w/e...

AW, and now someone's mad @ me b/c they have the comprehension level of a 12 year old...

NOT MY FAULT.

Bwahaha, I'm not NEARLY the asshole I could be, and I still get bitched @.. Grow some fuckin' balls, people.. Act like we're older than 18.. Well, MUCH older.. Haha. Everyone gets so pissy w/ me.. WELL, it's JUST as annoying to not be understood as it is to never understand.. Sorry I'm frustrated, guys/girls, but some of you are just tooooooooooooo stupid @ times.. And then, when I'm arguing my point........ JUST LISTEN, I WILL HELP YOU UNDERSTAND.. But NO, you gotta get butthurt b/c I'm "being a dick", and completely miss the point..

DJGHLJDSHLJBSDGSD OMFG TJ YOU'RE RIGHT... SO RIGHT.... I need to ration out my days.. Only certain amounts of time can be doled out to people who always take offense, or feel slighted by the dumbest things... It's killing me, and not even slowly anymore.. It's a rapid decline.

How many times in the past year alone have I had to make blogs like this..... CAN NO ONE TELL HOW MUCH THEY ARE ANNOYING ME!?!? I'M SO OBVIOUS WHEN I'M ANNOYED, OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES! WHO STILL THINKS THEIR DRAMA/STUPIDITY IS SOMETHING I GAF ABOUT??? LET MEEEEEE KNOW, ACTUALLY I WILL LET YOOOOUUUUUU KNOW...

Oh no wait.. I've BEEN doing that, but it still makes it's way back...

Haha.. Speaking of which, I bought Rebecca a button that says "I ♥ Recycling".. HOOOOOOW awesome is that!?!? I keep forgetting to give it to her.. Doubt she'll think it's funny, but oh well. Not many people are gonna find this blog funny, either, but OH WELL. I'm irritated right now, and this is the only way I can talk and be LISTENED TO W/O INTERRUPTION, sooooooo...

AAAAAAAAAAND THAT TAKES US TO THE NEXT CHAPTER, STUDENTS...

STOP. TELLING. ME. WHAT. TO. BLOG. ABOUT. If your name got mentioned OH FUCKING WELL, guess you shouldn't have gotten on my nerves, hm??? Lots of people don't like what I've had to say about them, but @ least I'm fucking saying it, instead of waiting and WHISPERING.... If you have something to say about this, fuck you in advance... Ha.. What a crock.. DGAF...

I think NOT.

Two people have recently griped to me about the "their personal business being on Myspace", and to that I say IF IT INVOLVED ME, I GUESS THAT MAKES IT OOOOOOOUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRR PERSONAL BUSINESS, MEANING I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BITCH ABOUT IT IN ANY MANNER I CHOOSE TO. Each and every fucking one of you call and text me out the ass to tell me about all sorts of goddamn drama.. What do you expect from me?? When I talk, you don't listen. The blog never turns a deaf ear to me, sooooooo...

All dumb bitches and stupid cunts will continue to be called out until IIIIIII feel satisfied, and if you don't like it, happiness is only ONE CLICK AWAY...

Do what you gotta do. I am, for the sake of my FUCKING SANITY. If you hate the blogs, you'll REALLY hate the book.

*deep sigh*

Man... Basically, what I'm saying is... And by saying, I mean NO ONE IS EXCLUDED........

YOU CANNOT STOP ME. I am not physically afraid of ANY of you. A-N-Y. If you can't beat me, you can't STOP me. CLOSE FRIENDS, BESTIES, WHOEVER... Don't think b/c I treat you diff, I'm afraid of you. If any of the people I have in my head right now came @ me, I would beat their fucking ass. If you can't have that same thought about me, STOP thinking you're fucking hard, or that I do, b/c I really don't.

There will come a time when I REALLY dgaf and just haul off and hit you. You really don't want it to come to that, or end on such a sour note, so I suggest you stfu. My phone and head ring 24/7 over some bullshit. I am not you, YOU gaf too much. Keep in mind when you start texting me that by YOU, I mean ALL of you, like I said. That way, no one can take it personal this time. This goes out to ANYONE who feels that lil pang of guilt/panic/wondering if I'm talking about them.

YES, YES I AM.

I feel so much better now.. Those last two paragraphs are basically the main problem right now. TOO MANY PEOPLE for some reason think that I would never hit them. This is not true, not true @ all. A few of you are cutting it close. I can't tell you not to mistake my kindness for weakness, b/c a lot of you have been ABUSING my kindness, hoping that it'll save you from being cussed out, or HIT, or anything else.

Time to put the kabash on that one.

For good.