"Sometimes the snoooow comes doooown in June....."
Anyway, hellooooooooo, niggerfaggots!! It's been a grip, right? Soooo much and so little has taken place in my life.. My sister had the baby Jun 6, and his name is Josiah. He waaaas... I think an oz under 6 lbs and 20 inches.. Long in the legs, just like the rest of us. The father is short, so that's pleasing.
The new generation of insane Williams children! Sorry for ya, kiddo.. Your mom is a ROYAL cunt. Saaaaaame goes for the Gma, haha... I can't wait til he's old enough for me to really tell him that. By then, I'm sure he'll have figured that part out.
Isn't he cuuuuuuuuute?? My Aunt Nene sent him that from Roanoke, along w/ a bunch of other shit. B/t the two of us, the boy is g'd up forever.. I just brought him 3 new pairs of shoes last night, on top of the 3 I gave her @ the shower.. Maaaaaaad clothes, too, omg.. I think I went overboard but I mean, it's my first nephew by blood so obv I'm gonna go all-out. And it's my baby sis, if she needs something and Iiiii can get it, obv I am. Like the cloth diapers for the burpy grossy stuff.. Apparently no one could find the ones I did, the ones that are thick?? W/e hos, I asked a CUSTOMER @ WM and they helped me find it, sooo. Maybe we just have a better Wally World??
Sooooooo yeah, the kid is hella cute and I dare you to say otherwise.. I'll delete you, right off buck @ that, haha.. Can't believe my sis pushed that cute fucker out. J/k, LA, you know I love you lol.. Weird how the youngest was the first to pop. But for real, I know it wasn't gonna be me or Lu so that obv left her. Lu is too selfish to have someone more important than him in his life, and I thought I was but maybe time has changed that. We shall see. Not ANYTIME soon, just prob not aaaaaaaaassssssss far into the future. Is that my 5-year plan??
Hey, even if it was, that works out b/c Larry and I talked about it one night walking.. If I got PG I'd just raise the kid in the house lol. Not PG by HIM, btw.. For anyone not sure of who I'm talking about. Just kill me now! I'd have a lil Webb just cuz they're so cute, but just for myself, not to raise w/ the father. Technically, I still would be, but not in the lovey way. Is that even possible?? Can you live w/ your sperm donor if he's not gay and have it neeeever become conflict?? Tawk amongst yaselves.
Whiiiiiiile you're doing that let me DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE OMFG I TOTALLY MET MY MAN-BRIDE THE DAY OF THE NKOTB SHOW OMFG DGHDSOFHGIDSHFJFIOJEFOIJEIOF;MIOMDIOESMDCIEJIOFJSMIOM _______________________________________________.
I FUCKING DID IT, FOLKS. And I said I would. I deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeef met Jesse McCartney, and DEEEEEEEEEEF fucking DIED, thanks. OMFG. I'm throwing up all over the keyboard, amazing how I can still get this story out in spite of that. LKLDJFKLSAMDLKASMKXLASMF. HE WAS SO FUCKING HOT, EW.
UGH. I spazzed when I saw him. Not TO him, duh. I'm too pro for that. B Diz, I know you feel me on THAT. HOW many awesome people have we met where we just Van Damme it until we get in the car. Liiiiiiike Faisst, etc. We got around the CORNER and shit bricks. So imagine when I saw JM standing in the hallway.. HOLY shit. I turned to every 14 yo near me and word vomited for like a full minute. I was like, "OMFG THERE HE IS. OMFG HE'S SO HOT OMFG I AM DEF GOING TO THROW THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOOOOOOOOOOMFG HIS OUTFIT, HE'S SOOOO FUCKING CUTE." lol... And MY smart ass.......
"Hi, I'm Jesse" (extends hand)
"Apparently.. (holds out poster of JM) That's what they tell me, anyway."
MEEEEEEANWHILE, I was fucking DYING to throw up all over him. I haven't even looked @ the pic yet. I want it to stay fresh in my mind the way I remember it.
AND DOOOOOOOON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FACT THAT I WAS THISCLOSE TO A FUCKING WAHLBERG @ ONE POINT, ALONG W/ JOEY AND DANNY. SHUUUUUUUUUT THEEEEEEEE FUCK UP PLEASE THANKS OMFG NOW I AM REALLY DYING, DSOIHIGODSHGKDSJPFJLSDPF. BLOGGING IS THE BEST THING IN THE WURRRRRRRRRLD, THANKS. I NEEDED TO LET THAT OUT. The magical moments I speak of cannot be replaced, ever. A real-live Wahlberg.. Oh my... I don't mean like, front row barrier mad far status, I mean that nigga went RIGHT past me, prob like 5 feet away. I could've eaten him alive right then and there. I seriously can't even talk about that night or my blood pressure will hit the fucking roof. I screamed like I was in labor, I stg. ALLLL fucking night. I'm glad my sis had the baby the next day, and not on the 5th cuz I'da hated to msg her like, "Um, def @ New Kids, sooooooo........." :|
Anyway.. I don't even know what else to say.. There's so many funny stories, but I'm glad to have gotten those out. My soul needs blogging but Grace is working on a fix for that. Technically I could just bring my ass to VA every week like I'm supposed to, but things change. Shit happens. Don't you think I miss my weekly tea and crumpets w/ Ka?? HARDCORE. And biiiiiitch, there's SO much to talk to YOOOOUUU about. LET me tell YOU. I prooooobably will be here Thurs, jbc of that. We have our non-$2 Tues Thursdays where we just gossip for like 3 hours in the restaurant, and I NEEEEEED that, STAT. Like, wtf is faster than that?? That's when I need it. OTHER than today cuz I'm on a mission to get some shit done.
Deeeef about to go see Gracie, Foxiest Mama of all.. I left my birth cert w/ my other stuff in her garage like a jacky and everytime I go over there (which def isn't that often) I forget. NOT today, bitch. I need that mafaka..
Aaaaand she has a vaporizer she wants me to try out. Oh lawdy! ;)
Can't wait to molest that sweet ass.
Uhh, what was I juuuust thinking, stfu.... OH! I had a blizz-ast @ Brent's and then T-Ravs last night. LOL @ how many people just went "And you couldn't have CALLED ME!??!"
No, bitches, apparently not. Don't get mad, cuz I got in "late" and def spent like an hour @ my Mas when I went to drop of baby shit. Blame that on Mo, who refused to put Jojo down. Not that I was in a rush to leave. He's so fucking cute. Awesome. And we were waiting for Buttons to realize where he was. He was confused on his whereabouts, which only makes sense if you know Rob. Def kicked it maaaad hard yesterday. His girl was there, and so was SAAAARAAAAAAAH, who gave me YET ANOTHER awesomely painful guilt trip about my lack of appearances in Derby Run. And I told on myself so many times that she just laughed and said the worst part is IIII am fueling it all by telling her times I've been around, just not in the Run, or something else like that. She shot me so many evil looks, jeeeez. My fucking BAD, people! It's just... I dunno.
HOWEVER....... While I can appreciate all your concern, I'm learning a valuable life lesson I couldn't have recieved anywhere else, and that pleases me. Def learning to love things I never thought I would, or @ least never would have admitted to any of you and part of it I still won't. You already know how I am.. But there's a certain comfort in not being known all over. You are the magnificent maestro of your affairs and goings-on and w/e people know about you in the factual manner is solely based on your output.
Sooo, to anyone trying to use the Jaws of Life to extract me, don't let me cry wolf for too long, b/c I def LOVE it more than you know. Let's start w/ the fact that I could be a visable force in your lives almost everyday if I chose to. But the choice is to be where I am, so obv something there is keeping it that way. There are def gripes, but your perception of the situation is mostly incorrect, and I prefer that over you having a full-scale view into my life. Yes, he is a controlling asshole but that's never gotten in the way of our friendship before, why would it now?? LMFAO.
Esssssp after he jumped into my SOUL and snatched out one of my greatest desires and wishes in life, and randomly suggested it after a week of me mulling over it. STFU, really?? We'd already been having a lot of moments like that, but that was the seal of fate. I still cannot believe he said it. You may as well skip to the bottom if you're waiting for me to reveal what it was, cuz it's not happening.
The only thing that is happening right now is the conclusion of this blog. As usual, it's never the end of the story, but it IIISSS the end of the blog.
PS, I met Jesse McCartney. Just remember that.
PPS, I still loooooove this song/video... Rawrr!
